Journal Entry #3

I have been busy lately with all the morsels of life, you know, the minutia of life that tend to go by unquestioned and even pleasantly unexplained, well, lately I have been chasing the meanings more than before.

I have been busy lately with all the morsels of life, you know, the minutia of life that tend to go by unquestioned and even pleasantly unexplained, well, lately I have been chasing the meanings more than before.

I find compelling. I find it interesting. But I don’t find it relaxing. Not at this point. As it is my necessity, not intrigue, that requires these answers.

How do I convert my mind to begin thinking for fun? How do I delve into my wondering as a reflex, rather than habit? I mean, I can do this but I require myself to be still, and silent, and impassioned about the idea of philosophy.

How do I convert my mind to begin thinking for fun? How do I delve into my wondering as a reflex, rather than habit? I mean, I can do this but I require myself to be still, and silent, and impassioned about the idea of philosophy.

I need to get to the same point with my thinking as I did with my relaxation techniques when I had severe panic disorder. I could just do these techniques, I could rely on these skills, whenever I needed them. I need to be this free in my mind as I am in my body. I need to be so free in my thought so I am avoid of mental process, so it becomes reflexive.

I need to be so free in my thought so I am avoid of mental process, so it becomes reflexive.

I am, however, otherwise happy. I have been meeting a lot of people lately and it is not alien to me to be personable and friendly and I have always been this way. It is my thinking and I need improved.

So as I close this entry today, I ignore my pain, my denial of which will improve when my thought becomes meditative and beautiful,

So as I close this entry today, I ignore my pain, my denial of which will improve when my thought becomes meditative and beautiful,

PS: I searched for a new psychiatrist last night. I was having a bad day. Mental note: work on your thinking!